September 28, 2011

inevitability. or, regret and pancakes.

As a writer, I'm guided by a feeling of inevitability--because that, to me, is the very heart of inspiration. It's as if words themselves already exist someplace and I'm simply putting them to paper. Of course, I'll think, as a story unravels itself, stretching across the page. Of course it was June, a Wednesday. Of course she carried mints instead of gum and read cookbooks on the subway, drank coffee black and beer from a bottle. When I write, even the smallest of details feel fated, as if they couldn't be any other way. And oh yes, yes, of course--of course!--the night ends with pancakes. Regret and pancakes.

Lately I've realized that sometimes, too, in real life--and not just in my fictional worlds--that same sort of feeling emerges every once in a while. I'll be walking down the street, lost in thought, or overhear a conversation about PBJ sandwiches on the bus, or be lying in the grass and smell lilacs where there are none--and all of a sudden I'll sense that maybe, just maybe, this second, this moment, was bound to happen. It will feel natural and expected, as if all along I may have known that I'd end up there.

All this is to say that... well, actually, I'm not sure what I'm trying to say. Maybe it's that certainty exists in strange places, or that some things--the tiniest of things in life--might be destined after all. 

Or maybe it's just that some things are meant to be.
And that comfort, such incredible comfort, can be found in creativity. 

(Photo: Mosbies)


Charissa Steyn said... [Reply to comment]

I LOVE the way you write!!! So beautiful. You just put my heart on paper ;) Thanks for the inspiration dear girl!

Vi said... [Reply to comment]

This is beautiful.
Vi x

Maura said... [Reply to comment]

Another beautiful post Laura!

siddathornton said... [Reply to comment]

this is so reassuring.

Jasmine said... [Reply to comment]

Very well written!

Mr Lonely said... [Reply to comment]

walking here with a smile. take care.. have a nice day ~ =D

Regards, (A Growing Teenager Diary) ..

chrissy said... [Reply to comment]

your words inspire.
im assuming you know that :) but i thought id just remind you