May 10, 2011

the big news, as promised.

I've been waiting a while to announce this--waiting so that I could let it sink in, waiting until I'd fully opened myself up to the idea and accepted it and felt its weight--but now I'm ready to share:

I'm moving to San Francisco in September.

There are a lot of reasons for our move. For one thing, it's where Radley's from--where he grew up, where all of his family lives. It's also where most of our college friends are, having made the trek from San Diego up to San Francisco after graduation. Luckily enough, I have a few lifelong friends who live there, too, and so the transition should be a fairly smooth one. 

I'm excited--really, really excited. My heart has been in California for as long as I can remember. Every year since I was a little girl, my family would take trips to Palo Alto, Santa Barbara, Los Angeles, Marina del Rey--and, of course, San Diego. We'd travel up and down the coast and as I watched the palm trees pass my window, I'd always think to myself: I can't believe people actually live here. As if it were an impossible dream, a just-out-of-reach paradise I'd never get to myself. 

And then, of course, I lived there. Four years. Four incredible, life-changing years. 

I've struggled since leaving San Diego, since leaving our little beach house where the windows were always open, where sand nestled itself in the carpet, where rooftop dinners were an everyday luxury. I've missed the ocean, I've missed the beach, I've missed the way time slows down on the West Coast, the way the sky seems bigger, brighter somehow. I've longed for the morning runs along the sand, salty air brushing my cheeks. I've longed for the afternoon hikes through the highest of hills, for the lingering bonfires beneath the stars. I've missed California. A lot. 

All that being said, though, Chicago will always be home. California may have a huge piece of my heart, but Chicago is home. Home. Chicago is family and forever friendships and every joy-filled memory of my childhood. It's everything, really.

This move is something to celebrate, to be sure--but please understand that my feelings will be mixed, tangled together in some sort of confused, sentimental knot. I won't be seeing my friends every day, won't be visiting my siblings and nieces and nephews on weekends, won't be seeing parents--my very best friends--just as often as I please.

The transition will not be entirely easy. Nothing ever is.
Because when you move forward, you inevitably leave something behind.

(Photo: Jaime)

27 comments:

Kristina said... [Reply to comment]

Wow this is huge news! I understand the mixed feelings completely, to a T actually. Ryan, my husband, is from Colorado - I am from Kansas. I moved to be with him at the end of 2006, until last August then we moved back to Kansas. Since August we have got to see my dad, whom is one of my very best friends. I've got to reconnect friendships. My best friend, the Matron of Honor in our wedding, lives here and now has had a baby. There is so much excitement here, HOWEVER, we will be moving back to Colorado in a few months. It's one of those things that I haven't officially announced via my blog yet until details are final, but it's happening. We both love Colorado there is so much to do, a different energy, all of his family is there. But part of me, especially looking into long term (having children) I'll yearn to want to be here. Where my dad can see his grandkids on the weekend, and where our kids can have regular playdates with my best friends kids, and other friends' kids around here. But, it's life - there are more opportunities for us both in CO, and we can make extra trips to KS through the year. A bittersweet thing for sure.

I'm glad to hear that you are excited about the move!! Sounds like it's something that you have wanted for so long! I'm sure it will be great and you will see you family and friends from Chicago more than you think! :)

Oh, My Darling said... [Reply to comment]

Here's to lots of adventures in your new San Francisco life chapter!

jackiek said... [Reply to comment]

Congratulations! I've never been to SF, but I have been to San Diego and few times and I'm pretty sure that's where I belong. There's something so incredible about California!

Lillian (Unstitched.) said... [Reply to comment]

That is so true...it's always this transitional period that's the hardest, most bittersweet part. But once you come and make your life here, it will all be wonderful, and you'll become the same, joyful, optimistic Laura again! :) Congratulations on your move here!! :) I'm so thrilled and excited for you - a new chapter to be started in your life, with lots of new adventures. Things will just get better and better! :)

Rissy said... [Reply to comment]

ahhh so this is what you meant when you replied to my comment and said you would "be in California sometime this summer"

So exciting! congratulations girls!

CarissaExplainsItAll

KT Mac said... [Reply to comment]

Ohhh! How exciting! Congratulations!

Rachael said... [Reply to comment]

I saw that picture before your words and I thought, 'I bet she's moving'. And you are! Wow. Congratulations! Even though you're feeling mixed about it, since you'll be leaving lots of people you love! I can understand what you're feeling. I'm at at point in my life, where I've already left some of my family, and home, and it's hard. But exciting at the same time. I kind of feel like, Hey, I want to stay with all these people I love but then I also want to leave and explore new places.
But it's exciting that you're going back to a place where you love. And that you know people there! AND that you're not going alone! That's even better. I'm sure that will be an even better chapter for you. I've lived in CA myself, San Diego, back when I was young. And I liked it. So I understand why you're glad to be going back!

Holly said... [Reply to comment]

Congrats! I absolutely love San Fran. Chicago will miss you!! :)

becky said... [Reply to comment]

Oh, I'm excited for you! So excited. Your last line, though, is the most humbling and the most thought-provoking thing I've heard in a while. It is so simple---but it has such deep, deep truth. I hope the transition becomes as easy as it can.

...and really, that line is something I will spend all evening mulling over...

becky said... [Reply to comment]

Oh, I'm excited for you! So excited. Your last line, though, is the most humbling and the most thought-provoking thing I've heard in a while. It is so simple---but it has such deep, deep truth. I hope the transition becomes as easy as it can.

...and really, that line is something I will spend all evening mulling over...

Elle said... [Reply to comment]

"I have learned that you make your own happiness, that part of going for what you want means losing something else. And when the stakes are high, the losses can be much greater."- Something Borrowed :)

PhotoPuddle said... [Reply to comment]

Wow, that's so exciting. I bet you'll have a rollercoaster of emotions when you move but I bet you end up loving it.

Laura Marie said... [Reply to comment]

@Elle Ahhh YES! Perfect! :)

Anna said... [Reply to comment]

You missed the MOST IMPORTANT PART: HELLLO that's where the the Tanner's live!
xoxo

DJ said... [Reply to comment]

Congrats -- I agree with Anna's Tanners comment above! :)

Caiti said... [Reply to comment]

Oh, I am so EXCITED for you! I love, love, LOVE the bay area!

Just a few minutes ago my friend and I were having a conversation about "home". She is living here, in southern California but is from Michigan, and I was raised here, but went to undergrad in Napa Valley, and how the moment my feet touch ground at SFO, and I take that first deep breath of Bay Area air and watch the fog roll in, I feel I am at "home"...And she feels the same way about California, even though she calls Michigan home.

I know it will be a tough transition for you, so I will be sending positive & loving thoughts your way as you make the most of your summer in Chicago! I can't wait to read about your adventures in the City by the Bay!

christine donee said... [Reply to comment]

congrats! Now we'll be closer to one another..

not that I'm a creeper or anything.

Caroline said... [Reply to comment]

Oh my goodness!! I am so excited for you!! Drinks and dinner are on me when I get to meet you!! Can't wait!!! I see lots of foodie/writing adventures in the near future. YAY YAY YAY! xo.

DT said... [Reply to comment]

Congratulations :)

Monica said... [Reply to comment]

how exciting for you. but yes, there's always a mix of feelings.

but, you will always have home. it never leaves you.

Nicole Marie said... [Reply to comment]

wohoooooooooooo!!!! even though i already knew this its exciting when you make the public announcement. like its actually going to happen :)

Nicole Marie said... [Reply to comment]

wohoooooooooooo!!!! even though i already knew this its exciting when you make the public announcement. like its actually going to happen :)

Aimee, Danny, Nya, Teyo said... [Reply to comment]

woohoo! so excited for you. you will adore living in SF. much less sun than san diego, but so full of charm and character. i hope our time there overlaps! i would love to see you. xoxo aimee

Becky said... [Reply to comment]

I'm a little behind on my blog reading so I am just now seeing this - congratulations! How exciting!

"Because when you move forward, you inevitably leave something behind." SO true!

Betsey said... [Reply to comment]

ah, Congrats! That is so awesome, a lovely adventure!

Kelly said... [Reply to comment]

Congratulations!! That is incredibly exciting.

"The transition will not be entirely easy. Nothing ever is.
Because when you move forward, you inevitably leave something behind." -- thank you for these words. I just graduated with my bachelor's this past weekend and you completely summed up how I am feeling.

Sweet said... [Reply to comment]

Well, what can I say Laura? I'm moving to California next week. I'll be based in San Jose, Calif. - barely an hour away from San Francisco. If I see you in one of the coffee shops in town, I'll say Hi. But please don't be startled :) Haha. Take care!