April 27, 2011

feelings aren't meant to be fixed.

Recently I was talking to a friend who said: "It's silly. I know I shouldn't feel this way." And all I could think was, 'Should?' At what point should we feel anything at all? Aren't feelings the one thing in our lives we shouldn't have to control?

Obviously, there's a point when our feelings can spiral into something destructive--and some certainly have an appropriate time and place... But to what end are we supposed to rein them in? And why do we always feel this impulse to apologize for anything short of the sunniest of outlooks? Don't the worst, most complicated feelings teach us something important about ourselves?

To me, feelings aren't meant to be fixed. They're meant to be wallowed in, reveled in, indulged to their fullest--both the good and the bad. Feelings are an ocean, an expanse, and they don't ask for a solution; they ask for understanding. Empathy. Acceptance.

This is simple. And yet, of course, it's not.
Still, I say: Feel. We owe ourselves that much, don't we?

(Photo: Shay Murphy)


Stephanie and Such said... [Reply to comment]

I love this! WHat a great point of view. Feelings just don't go away in one day. Things take time. I am learning to appreciate that :)


becky said... [Reply to comment]

Beautiful beautiful beautiful. Such wisdom and voice---and better than that: such truth.

Nicole Marie said... [Reply to comment]

oh my gosh so true! for so many months i was upset or sad or angry but on top of that i was upset that i was upset.

Rachael said... [Reply to comment]

That is so true. It is funny how people apologize for how they feel sometimes. You can't control how you feel! You always post really introspective posts! You're making me think girl!

Hannah Elizabeth said... [Reply to comment]

I love little ironic moments in life.

I've been having a sad day for kind of no reason. I'm ready to be done with finals. I tired of my boy living across the country. And I want hours to read the books I WANT to read...not books I HAVE to read for school. and I was tired of being sad and feeling so melancholy for "no good reason"

So I actually made a mental decision to come read your blog post before I dived into my mountain of homework so I could have a little spot of sunshine.

oh universe, how you know just what we need and when we need it.

Alexandria said... [Reply to comment]

Great point of view! And that picture is pretty :)


Caiti said... [Reply to comment]

beautiful. you have such a beautiful way with words!

Kelly said... [Reply to comment]

This is so true. I say that all the time, especially when I get upset over little things. Like when my pet snail died last week (I know, snail??) and I said to boyfriend, "I shouldn't be crying right now." But who says what we are supposed to feel? Thanks for reminding me :)