what's familiar.

Glen Ellyn feels so hopeful this time of year. The oak trees bend over the streets to make tunnels, the air smells like lilacs, and the nighttime fireflies fill the sky after dusk. At the boathouse, small kids sit at the edge of the dock, fishing poles in hand, packed lunches set against leaning bikes. In the park, there's a lemonade stand, a game of kick-the-can, the old man from down the street sitting on a bench with the local newspaper. From where you stand, you can see your house, your castle of a high school, your favorite climbing tree, and your initials etched into a wooden post beside a heart, his name.

There's nothing quite like it, being so knee-deep in your past, and after spending just a few days in my cozy hometown, I feel more than a little restored. Sometimes you have to take a quick time out, a break from the everyday to see your friends and laugh with your family. To soak up what's familiar.

today i believe...

... that walking through the quiet, charming streets of your hometown on a warm Summer night can bring you back in time like nothing else.

... that you should embrace the sorts of challenges that energize and inspire you.

... that watermelon and feta is a magical Summer combination.

... that May marks the season of popsicles and weekend road trips, of picnics and long, you'll-never-get-to-them-all reading lists — of hope and romance and days that stretch forever.

... that you can just never have too many small notebooks.

... that there's something to be said for the lifelong friendships, for the nearly-family people in your life who listen and care and connect the dots without you saying a single word.

... that the easiest way to find clarity is to travel by yourself, even if it's just across town.

... and that love, more than anything else, can surprise you.

(Photo: My Hometown | Instagram)

workshop 2: imperfect beginnings

Beginning can be the hardest part, don't you think? Last week, after the first Writers Workshop, several readers asked for my thoughts on writer's block, and truth is, there's no way to move past writer's block without moving right through it. Half the battle is that very first sentence. 

When you start to write, my advice is to put down whatever phrase comes to mind, regardless of how strange or lame or clunky it may seem. Those first few words can be enough to get you going, and from there it's a matter of trusting your instincts — accepting the fact that every word won't be perfect. As with photography, one of the most important parts of writing is editing, so let yourself write freely knowing that you'll tweak, fix, and dig deeper later on.

Something to remember: A first sentence can take you in an infinite number of directions, and that sense of possibility is what makes writing fun… or miserable, depending on how picky you are. For right now, nix the early self-criticism and go with your gut, because those initial impulses will help you discover what kind of writer you are naturally.

Example: If I'm working with the phrase It wasn't easy to say, these are my first instincts:

It wasn't easy to say, but he needed to know the truth.

It wasn't easy to say, I could tell, and she struggled to meet my eyes as she spoke.

It wasn't easy to say, but if I had to guess, I'd have admitted that he probably loved me.

It wasn't easy to say to my mom, but hell, if I couldn't tell her, who was left?

It wasn't easy to say how I felt, but I knew I'd already given myself away with the anxious wave.

Ready to put the idea into practice? I'll share a short, simple phrase to use as the starting point, and from there, you can write whatever you want — a few sentences, a few paragraphs, fiction, non-fiction, dialogue, anything. The key is to let yourself follow those first impulses, writing whatever comes to mind with that first phrase. And the real fun comes into play when we see how differently people spin those simple words, so please link to your work below so that the rest of us can check it out!

Prompt: I knew he loved me... 

I knew he loved me from the way he said my name — slowly, as if he hoped to give each syllable its due. His voice seemed lighter when he spoke it, airy, so that my name always came out as a sigh.

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If you decide to participate, share the link to your work using the "Add Your Link" button below, then join the conversation on Twitter and Instagram using the hashtag #LTCWorkshop!

the magic of california.

There's nothing quite like a long, lingering dinner, especially when you're sitting within a towering circle of redwoods, lights strung high above your heads, wine bottles filling the table, belly laughs leaving you doubled over for what feels like hours on end. There's nothing like jaunty, back-and-forth conversation filled with life's greatest meanings and most offensive, ridiculous jokes. There's nothing like dessert, and there's nothing — absolutely nothing — like almost-summer, that in-between season marked by lukewarm nights that remind you of childhood and fireflies, s'mores and flashlight tag.

And really, there's just nothing like the magic of California. It's never lost on me.

(Photo: Dinner at the Lark Creek Inn | My Instagram)

workshop 1: writing with focus.

Welcome to the first Little Things & Curiosities Writers Workshop!

To kick things off, we're going to ease into the process by sticking to a narrow focus. Sure, there's something to be said for that imaginative, discover-as-you-go sort of writing, but some of the greatest, simplest truths come from writing within boundaries. A tip I try to follow? Find one small phrase that inspires you and let that guide the rest of the piece. This week, in honor of Mother's Day, we're taking a look at motherly love, and the phrase I had in mind was "over-the-top kind of love."

Prompt: Pick one specific thing that fascinates you about a mother in your life, whether that's your mom, a friend's mom, a grandma, an aunt, a sister, a neighbor, whoever. Let the writing flow in a natural direction, but keep that one special thing in mind as you go along.

The way a person handles birthdays says a lot about their character, and my mom, there's nothing she does better than a birthday. Confetti runs through her veins. She loves to celebrate the people she loves, and over the years, I've adopted that same attitude. I live for birthdays, mine and everybody else's, and I always thought the rest of the world felt the same, too. But, well, not so much.

It was the sixth grade when I met my first anti-birthday friend. "Birthdays are silly," she said. "They're childish." Twelve years old and hoping to be anything but childish, I pretended to agree. "Yeah," I said. "Birthdays are lame." 

Her feelings sat with me for days. Silly? Birthdays? What's not to love about cake and candles and celebrating life with the people you love most? Didn't she appreciate the balloons, the parties, the trick-candle wishes? Didn't she — gasp — appreciate a good theme party?

I've met many a birthday hater since then, and my first thought is always the same: 

You don't like birthdays? Well, you must not know my mother. 

You must not know that the best way to celebrate is with a breakfast cookie and a first-thing-in-the-morning present. You must not know the value of everyone you know wearing matching t-shirts and surprising you at a friend's house. You must not know that there are catalogs with cheesy birthday gear you can personalize for the whole group to wear: rings that glow, hats with streamers, yo-yos and candies and anything you could ever imagine with your name on it. Because, well, why not?

Birthdays should be wildly, exceptionally cheesy — this I know for sure. My mother has gone to extraordinary lengths to show me the power of a rhyming birthday poem, a cake with your face on it, a mantle lined with an entire aisle's worth of Hallmark cards. She's perfected the small get-together and the giant birthday roast and, really, what could say "I love you" better than a neon shirt and a birthday pun?

My mom believes in a lot of things. She believes in God and loyalty and the value of a kind neighbor. In showing up, in letting go. In chocolate. And if you asked her, my mom would say she believes wholeheartedly in birthdays because, if you let them, they carry a certain kind of magic — a Christmas-like magic, the kind of magic that can only come from a cheesy, over-the-top kind of love.

When I turned four, there was a homemade cowgirl costume. At eleven, our house turned into a game-show paradise, a different game in every room. Two years later, my first surprise party, and with sixteen, another. For eighteen, nineteen, and every birthday since, my mother's done whatever she had to do to be part of my birthday. Each year I find her standing on my doorstep with a bundle of balloons, a box of homemade cookies, and the kind of knowing smile that etches itself in your memory.

Through the years there have been small, cozy birthdays and big, extravagant bashes, and it didn't matter where we were celebrating or who was there or what she said, but on every birthday, my mom's managed to make me feel like a little kid again. Like I'd wake up to a birthday miracle, a bedroom somehow filled with decorations — her favorite trick, as if she were a birthday fairy.

And you know what? Maybe she is. Maybe my mom's a birthday fairy, and maybe that's why she knows without a shadow of a doubt that we all deserve a day — one wonderful, magical, adventure of a day to remind us each year that we're loved.

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If you decide to participate, share the link to your work in the comments section so that the rest of us can check it out! Have a question about the writing process? A tip? Hoping to connect with other writers? Ask me here or join the dialogue on Twitter and Instagram using #LTCWorkshop.

writers workshop.

For months I've been meaning to join a writers group, and recently it dawned on me: why not create one right here? Ever since grad school, I've been looking for a place where I can learn from fellow writers, gather inspiration, and share my own thoughts on writing. Truth is, each day I spend at least nine hours writing for work, an hour or so writing fiction, and even more time writing here on the blog, but I very rarely get to do something I truly love: to read and write about writing.

So how will it work? On Wednesdays, this space will become the Little Things & Curiosities Writers Workshop (#LTCWorkshop) and each week, I'll share a writing prompt, my own response, plus some of my favorite writing inspiration from around the web. The key to all of this is you, though, because I'd love for you to contribute. My hope is that this becomes a conversation, a place where we can collect inspiration. And if you do end up writing on the prompt topic, I'd encourage you to share the link to your work in the comments section so the rest of us can enjoy it!

As things move along, I may offer some tips and tricks that I picked up in grad school or at work, because when it comes to writing advice, I've found that every little bit helps. More is more! In the meantime, though, I'd love to know what you'd like out of this space. As a writer, what sorts of things are you looking for? How could this little writing community help you? Let me know!

I'll be sharing my first prompt and response tomorrow, so I hope you'll join me!

(Photo: My In-Progress Office | Instagram)

just for fun: tips for seeing your ex

With so many weddings and summer events approaching, I've been talking to a lot of friends about some inevitable ex run-ins... And so, my latest post on POPSUGAR Sex & Culture:

The Dos and Don'ts of Seeing Your Ex — in GIFs

Any good (or sarcastic) tips to add? :)

around the web: for fan girls.

The Great Gatsby soundtrack! (Yep, already obsessed.)

A seriously amazing website for those who can't get enough of Game of Thrones.

Just for fun: Ryan Gosling being adorable. Again.

FYI, Justin Timberlake took down 5 tequila shots in 10 minutes on live TV.

Why I'm such a hockey fan, and why you should definitely be one too.

Ha! What the Disney princesses would be like in college. (Which one were you?)

Happy Friday — have a great weekend!

flaws and charms.

I've been thinking a lot about how when you love someone, their flaws can become their charms. The strange, quirky, and even the most irritating things that they feel most self-conscious about — and what others, too, may find off-putting — can become exactly what you adore most.

I tend to talk too much and think too much and write too much. I hog the covers. I'm compulsively, unnecessarily early to any and every event, plus a whopping three hours early to the airport every single time. I have terrible motion sickness, which makes me an awful date for amusement parks, boat rides, and anything that involves a school bus. I'm allergic to cats and dogs, I can't help but comment on every preview in movie theaters, and I'm so afraid of mice, I won't even watch Stuart Little.

On Sundays, I write out plans for the week that rarely come to fruition. I'm picky about certain vegetables, selfish about sharing my favorite foods, and stubborn when it comes to ordering anything but my go-to meal from familiar restaurants. I'm scared of mountain biking and in theory, I love gardening, but in practice, I'd rather just lay out in the sun with a good book and a margarita.

Radley forgets to close cabinets. He leaves the lights on every day in every room and he lets his dirty clothes make a mountain on the bathroom floor. He sometimes pours Cheez-Its straight from the carton onto his chest and eats them from there, and at night, he gets lost in YouTube black holes, learning about weird addictions or sports statistics or the latest conspiracy theories. He keeps leftovers for far too long and ignores expiration dates and never, ever turns down a cup of coffee, even if it makes for his eighth of the day. He can be easily distracted and also easily charmed, for better or for worse.

And despite — or perhaps because of — all this, he loves me, and I love him, and our relationship feels stronger. Neither of us is perfect, to be sure, and every once in a while, we'll feel the need to point that out. If you asked us, though, we'd both admit to loving it all. To loving all of each other, even the worst parts, because we know those pieces and understand them and we're proud that we've learned to navigate those darker patches because that effort marks the difference between love and marriage.

(Photo by my great friend Tom McAndrew)

today i believe...

... that one of the greatest, simplest joys of a new home is discovering how the space grows and changes with each new season. (Especially spring.)

... that spending time with someone from your hometown can return you to yourself.

... that there are few film adaptations as good as the original novel — The Notebook, and maybe The Perks of Being a Wallflower — but The Great Gatsby sure seems to be in the running.

... that nothing hints at summer quite like fresh, ripe watermelon.

... that a long trip on public transportation — of any kind, really — somehow fuels creativity, bringing the best, most inspiring thoughts to the surface.

... and that there's just something to be said for living a quiet life every once in a while.